It was a November day just 6 years ago today. The day was nice and ordinary; outside was bit cold and gloomy, but still. I’m making dinner in the kitchen when my 14 year old son Eirik comes to me. He is a bit worried, and I can see that he wants to tell me something, but he is hestitating. He looks at me, looks down, looks at me again and says; Hey dad … -Yes, I say. What is it?
Ahhhh, Charlen has been raped, and she is in there now……
I look at my son and don’t understand what he is saying. – What are you saying? – I ask.
Charlen has been raped, and she is there now. I look at him again and see the hurt in his eyes. He is hurt, and it feels like he really didn’t want to tell me this. I’m grabbing my head and trying to understand what he is saying… I’m hearing the words over and over again, but I don’t really understand what he is saying. This is not happening, this is not true. I’m dreaming, I’m having nightmares…
We are a family of 3 children who at this time are 8, 14 and 16 years old. We moved from the north of Norway to a beautiful city in southeastern Norway 8 years ago, 2 months after the youngest was born.
My wife worked in the municipality, and I was the director of a kindergarten, something I had been doing for the past 16 years. We were enjoying, had many friends and often did things with the kids. The kids were good at school, had many friends and we felt like we were living a happy life. We felt we had done a good job in the upbringing and that most of the things went smoothly.
It turned out that the life of the whole family was totally turned upside down overnight, and that many years of pain would follow.
I am looking through a kitchen window. I pinch myself in the arm, look at my son who is standing with his head bent. I sit down on the couch for a few minutes and think…. I do not know what I’m thinking about… I ask Eirik if he knows when she’s coming home … No, he can’t reach her. I’m trying to call her, but I’m not coming through. Something that I have never experienced before or after is growing inside me. It’s beginning to get to me that my dear daughter has been raped, but I do not know anything anymore. Has it happened today, is it happening now? What should I do? Should I call the police? Right now I don’t control the mind or the body. I’m going into a trance and acting without thinking.